And I thought that Saint Thérèse was a saint for the pious and the ignorant…
There you can see how deep the well of your own ignorance is.

We continue to contemplate the mystery of grace and freedom in the Autobiographical Manuscripts of Saint Thérèse of the Child Jesus.

The Lord grants her the grace of apostolic zeal on that same Christmas night, when the little weeper was strengthened forever. When she was thirteen years old.

«That bright night The third period of my life began, the most beautiful of all, the most full of heaven’s graces. The work that I had not been able to accomplish in ten years, Jesus accomplished in an instant, contenting himself with my good will, which, by the way, had never lacked me. I could say to him like the apostles: “Lord, I have been fishing all night without catching anything” [Lk 5,5]. More merciful to me than to his disciples, Jesus himself took the net, cast it, and brought it out full of fish. He made me a fisher of souls. I felt a great desire to work for the conversion of sinners, a desire that I had never felt so strongly until then. I felt, in a word, that charity entered my heart, the obligation to forget myself to please others. From then on I was happy…

«The same cry of Jesus on the cross, “I thirst!” [Jn 19:28] resonated continually in my heart… I myself felt devoured by the thirst of souls. They were not yet the souls of the priests the ones that attracted me, but that of the great sinners. I was burning with the desire to free them from eternal fire” (V,45v).

Jesus himself is forming the future Doctor of the Church. During those years Thérèse developed a desire to know, especially in matters of history and science. But the Lord soon made her see that “that was nothing more than vanity and affliction of spirit [+Eccl 2,11]” (V,46v).

«I was at the most dangerous age for young women. But God accomplished in me what Ezekiel tells in his prophecies [16:8-13]: “Passing by my side, Jesus saw that the time had come for me to be loved… He spread his mantle over me, washed me with precious perfumes, dressed me in embroidered clothes… He fed me with the purest flour, with honey and oil in abundance… All this made me beautiful in his eyes, and he made me a powerful queen.” Yeah, Jesus did all this with me…

«For a long time I had been fed with “the pure flour” contained in the Imitation. This was the only book that benefited my soul, since I had not yet found the treasures hidden in the Gospel… At the age of fourteen, with my strong desire for knowledge, God saw fit to add to “pure flour”, “honey and oil in abundance”… He provided them to me in the lectures of Mr. Abbe Arminjon on The end of the present world and the mysteries of the future life…That reading was also one of the greatest graces I have received in my life» (V,47r-v).

Celina and Teresa, with all this, are preparing for their entry into Carmel. «Yes, we followed lightly in the footsteps of Jesus. The sparks of love that he sowed with his hands full in our souls… made fleeting things disappear from our eyes, and from our lips flowed aspirations of love inspired by him… I think that We received graces of an order as high as those granted to the great saints… Love made us find on earth the One whom we were looking for” (V,47v).

«Thanks so great could not remain without fruits… and renunciation became easy for me even in the first moment. Jesus said: “To him who has will be given more, and he will find plenty” [Mt 13:12]. By a grace faithfully received, He granted me a multitude of new graces. He gave himself to me in Holy Communion more frequently than I would have dared to hope” (V,48r-v).

Jesus himself is her spiritual director. «My path was so straight, so luminous, that I didn’t need anything other than Jesus as a guide.. He compared spiritual directors to faithful mirrors that reflected Jesus in souls, and he thought that in my case God did not use intermediaries, but worked directly… Because I was little and weak, he lowered himself to me and secretly instructed me in the things of his love. Ah! If the wise men who lived dedicated to study had examined me, they would certainly have been surprised to see a fourteen-year-old girl penetrate the secrets of perfection, secrets that all their science would never be able to reveal to them, because to possess them it is necessary to be poor in spirit” (V,48v).

By pure grace of God Thérèse enters Carmel. Everything, beginning with her age, fifteen, was against her. The efforts made by those who supported her attempt all came to nothing. «I found no help in the land, which seemed to me an arid desert without water [Ps 62,2]. I had placed my hope in God alone” (VI,66r). And this hope did not lead to inert passivity – hope is a virtus, a strength–, but, on the contrary, filled her with audacity, and overcoming her shyness, made her reach Pope Leo XIII himself (XI-20-1887).

Finally, “despite all the obstacles, What God wanted was done. The Lord did not allow the creatures to do what they wanted, but what he wanted» (VI,64r). And although the superior of the Carmel of Lisieux did not want to admit her, so that three blood sisters would not come together in community, «God, who holds the hearts of creatures in his hand and handles them as he wants, changed the dispositions of religious said» (VIII,82v), and was finally able to enter in April 1888. «This is how Jesus acted with his Thérèse. After having tried her for a long time, he fulfilled all the desires of her heart” (VI,67v).

«The illusions! God granted me the grace of not bringing any [illusion] to Carmel. I found religious life just as I had imagined it. No sacrifice surprised me… Jesus made me understand that he wanted to give me souls through the cross. And my desire to suffer grew with the suffering itself” (VII,69v). The Prioress, Mother María de Gonzaga, was very severe with her from the beginning. «And this was a priceless grace. How God visibly worked in the one who was in his place! What would have happened to me if, as the people of the world believed, I had been the toy of the Community? (VII,70v).

Sister Thérèse confesses that she was still somewhat attached to the use of pretty things. But «my Director [Jesus]He endured that with patience, because He is not used to directing souls by teaching them everything at once. It usually gives its lights little by little… It didn’t take me long to convince myself that The further one advances on this path [of perfection], the further one believes oneself from the term. That’s why now I resign myself to always seeing myself as imperfect, and I find my joy in that” (VII,74r).

Very soon, however, Jesus wanted to free her from those small attachments and gave her great insight into poverty., making him understand that it “consists not only of being deprived of things nice, but also of the essential. Thus it was that, in the midst of the external darkness, the Lord illuminated me internally” (ib.).

God gives her the grace to love mortification very much. She confesses that when she lived in her family home she was “very far from resembling those beautiful souls who from their childhood practiced all kinds of mortifications. I didn’t feel any attraction for them.. Without a doubt, that was due to my cowardice… My mortifications consisted of breaking my will, always ready to get its way; in withholding a word of reply, in providing small services without making them count, in not supporting one’s back when sitting, etc. etc.” (VI,68v). Since she was a child, as we have already seen, she had been taught to seek holiness in “fidelity in the smallest things” (IV,33v).

Already in Carmel, likewise, “I dedicated myself especially to the practice of small virtues, because it is not easy for me to practice the big ones. Thus, for example, I liked to fold the cloaks that the Sisters forgot, and provide them with the small services I could. I was also given a great love of mortification. And this love was all the greater, the less I was allowed to do to satisfy it… If I had obtained permission to do many penances, surely my ardor would not have lasted for long. The solaces that they granted me, without me asking for them, were mortify my self-love, which benefited me much more than corporal penances” (VII,74v).

Thérèse is always moved by Jesus. “Without me you can do nothing” (Jn 15:5). We know – it is by faith – that grace usual empowers man for supernatural acts, worthy of eternal life. But we also know that thanks current of the Lord always activate him for good. This doctrine, as I already explained, is the most in accordance with Scripture, the conciliar Magisterium and the experience of the saints: «God, how many times do we do well, that we may work, work in us and with us” (Orange II, Denz. 379; cf. Trento ib.1546; STh I-II,109, 9). Well, Saint Thérèse of the Child Jesus, by bearing witness to her spiritual experience, continually confirms this doctrine in her writings.

For example, on the occasion of her religious profession in September 1890, she declared: “I have frequently observed that Jesus never wants to give me provisions. He feeds me moment by moment with a freshly made delicacy. I find it in me without knowing how or where it comes from. I simply believe that It is Jesus himself, hidden in the depths of my poor little heart, who works in me, making me understand at every moment what he wants me to do” (VIII,76r). “Yes I know; when I am charitable, It is only Jesus who acts in me» (X,12v). «It is no longer I who live; it is Christ who lives in me” (Gal 2:20).

She does good when Jesus works it in her and with her; but without Him, she can do nothing. We can see it, for example, in this anecdote. When she took on the religious veil, she was very saddened by the absence of her father, who was admitted to a health house. «That day Jesus allowed that I was not able to contain my tears… In fact, I had endured other, much greater trials without crying; but it was because I had been aided by a powerful grace. On the contrary, on the 24th, Jesus left me abandoned to my own strength, and I showed how little I was» (VIII,77r).

Jesus gives you saints wishes and then gives him his strength to work them. Everything is a gift of his grace. «How merciful has been the path on which God has always taken me. He has never made me want something that he has not granted me later.» (VII,71r). He repeats it many times in his writings. God “did not want me to have a single desire without seeing it immediately satisfied” (VIII,81r). «The Lord is so good to me that it is impossible for me to be afraid of him. He has always given me what I wanted, or better yet, he has always made me want what he intended to give me.» (XI,31r).

«Ah, how many reasons I have to thank Jesus for having seen fit to fulfill all my desires! At present I no longer have any desire, if it is not to love Jesus madly… My childhood desires have disappeared… I no longer desire suffering or death, although I continue to love them: love is the only thing that attracts me…At present, only abandonment guides me, I have no other compass» (VIII,82v).

Abandonment, pure love and no will of my own. Saint Thérèse no longer wants anything of her own will. Wants no more, no less, nor anything else, than that that God specifically wants to work in it. On Christmas 1887, in a little boat that carries the sleeping Baby Jesus in his room, he reads a single word: “abandonment” (VI,68r). Now, in Carmel, with the death ofchildhood wishes, Teresa no longer wants anything: «only abandonment is my guide… It is no longer possible for me to ardently ask for anything except the perfect fulfillment of God’s will for my soul., without creatures being able to put obstacles… “Only loving is my exercise” [Saint John of the Cross, Chant 28])» (VIII,83r). And in this total abandonment Thérèse finds her peace and joy. «In both small things and big things God gives a hundredfold in this life to the souls who have abandoned everything for their love” (VIII,81v).

Jesus wants what Thérèse wants, since she no longer wants anything but the will of Jesus. “He has always given me what I wanted, or better yet, he has always made me want what he intended to give me.” (XI,31r).

Author: Fr. José María Iraburu